| PICTURE GOES HERE |
| After the multitude of cats dine, the
students devote the first academic period to brushing long-hairs, scooping
the litter boxes, checking for ear mites, picking out fleas, dangling cat
toys, and planting catnip seed in windowsill pots. The older children teach
their charges tricks -- roll over, beg for salmon balls, pee on the principal's
briefcase. |
| Principal Pumpernickle looks on with
dismay. At educational conferences, he always attempted to pass off this
hour as therapeutic vocational training or an early intervention program
to prevent juvenile delinquency. Judging from the inevitable snickers,
educators nationwide had already heard the truth. |
| The principal glances now at the gigantic
portrait of dearly-departed
Widow Hughes, who presided over the daily cat care sessions. As the
nutcase grew older and older, she had relished toying with the Mayor and
School Board about her future donation. No one knew the downside until
the Widow was buried: her mansion in exchange for perpetual cat duties. |
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